Sunday, May 1, 2005

How To Change Yourself In Any Way You Desire

"Dr. Kuhn," she said, "I've been looking forward to talking with you."

I was attending an early Kentucky Derby event and the hostess was someone I've know for a few years. "I've been having problems with taking myself way too seriously the past couple weeks," she elaborated.

"You have my book, The Fun Factor, right," I asked her.

"Yes," came her reply.

I continued, "And you've applied my HA HA HA Prescription to all areas of your life, right? Just as I prescribe?"

"Yes, and I've had great success with it," she beamed. "My husband and I are rarely fighting anymore and my work is going great! It's just been these last two weeks...I find myself feeling and acting so stressed out. I don't know what to do."

"Have you been in charge of organizing this event?" I asked.

"Yes," came her reply.

"Then I think I know exactly why you've been experiencing those problems," I told her. "And I have some great news for you..."

Experiencing frustration when you relapse against positive changes you've made is very common. You have undoubtedly made some profound changes in your life based on my Fun Factor prescription. You have told me about how The Fun Factor has helped you with weight loss, family reconciliation, returning to your job, stopping smoking, being a parent, and many other wonderful accomplishments.

Yet, for all the positive changes your focus on fun and humor bring, you still occasionally get bitten by the seriousness bug. And it screws up your life a little bit.

To that end, I have some very interesting information to share with you this week. The following five stages of change were developed by a University of Rhode Island psychology professor named James Prochaska. These five stages have become very influential because they've helped many, many people progress towards a life without harmful, destructive habits.

I trust they will be helpful to you also. Of course, I want you to read through them with an eye toward gauging how far you've progressed in jettisoning seriousness and incorporating fun, but they work just as well to measure any positive change you want to make. I've also included typical statements you might hear yourself making when you are in each stage, to further assist you in identifying your current status.

Dr. James Prochaska's Five Stages of Change (As Applied to Your Seriousness)

  1. Stage One: Precontemplation. In this stage, you're thinking you'll never change. You're still in denial about your seriousness. A typical statements from this stage include "It's not really that bad," or "I can change anytime I want, I just don't want to right now."


  2. Stage Two: Contemplation. In this stage you are aware of your seriousness and you're going to replace it with fun someday. You're full of good intentions. A typical statement from this stage would be, "I know I need to take myself less seriously and I plan on doing it."


  3. Stage Three: Preparation. In this stage you are making definite plans to stop taking yourself so seriously. As an aside, don't stop here! Research indicates that over 85% of people needing to make health-related changes never even make it to Step Three or beyond. Typical statements from this stage are, "This is the year that I'm going to stop being so serious," or "Starting next month I'm going to start taking myself less seriously."


  4. Stage Four: Action. In Stage Four you are actually using fun to guide and motivate you rather than seriousness and fear. As an aside, make sure you dive right in to The Fun Factor! Feeling quick, positive differences in your life makes it much easier to graduate to the final stage. Typical statements from someone in Stage Four include "I'm actually doing this," and "I feel really good about using fun - it's making a difference!"


  5. Stage Five. Maintenance. In this stage you've achieved the opportunity to use fun forever because you've created new mental pathways in your brain, retraining it. (See last week's Fun Times for more on this) But be aware that the old mental pathways of seriousness you've abandoned do not disappear! It is easy to fall back on old, bad habits of seriousness when you're stressed - we call this a relapse. A typical statement from this stage is "Fun is part of my life now and I really feel lousy when I get serious."



Here are my doctor's orders after you've identified which stage of change you're in:

If you identify yourself in Stages One, Two, or Three in regard to replacing your seriousness with fun, keep reading The Fun Times and my website articles until you're ready for Stage Four.

If you identify yourself in Stage Four, make sure you have my Fun Factor prescription and are applying it in all areas of your life. Feeling the incredible difference fun makes is vital to reaching Stage Five.

If you identify yourself in Stage Five, continue to use The Fun Factor and do not beat yourself up for your occasional relapse into seriousness. As you now know, your setbacks are not defeats - they are merely reminders that we need to keep our focus on fun today.

And that is exactly what I shared with my hostess that night. I was certain that she knew how to have fun, but the stress she had fallen into while planning this Derby event had triggered a relapse of seriousness.

Realizing this, she made a point to redouble her efforts to use fun to motivate and guide her. And you can do this too; don't get down on yourself if you fall "off the wagon" because all you're doing is reverting to old habits in times of stress. Just remember why you made your change, get back on your horse, and pick right back up with your new, healthy habit!


Cliff Kuhn, M.D.
The Laugh Doctor

The Natural Medicine of Humor
"Discover a unique, FREE, and incredibly powerful prescription created out of desperation by a (formerly) stressed-out Kentucky psychiatrist"

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Sunday, April 24, 2005

Use Fun To Retrain Your Brain

There is a long standing myth that your brain is "hardwired" at an early age and then very difficult to change. The good news is that this myth is not true; your brain retains its ability to learn, to be trained, throughout your life. I'll explain how you can take full advantage of this in a moment...

Dr. Michael Merzenich, a professor at the University of California at San Francisco, has studied a phenomena that has long puzzled us. If we can change, why don't we? Just like a rat who has maneuvered a maze 100 times, you have habits that have driven changes into your brain. Even when those habits are not fulfilling, it is still very difficult for the average person to change them.

Make no mistake, when you learn a skill it really does change, or distort, your brain. Dr. Merzenich says that a highly skilled specialist, such as a surgeon or musician, has pathways in their brain that show up on an MRI while they are performing. A trumpet player, for example, has enlarged representations in their brains for the areas that control their lips, breathing, and fingers.

You, too, have thousands of pathways you've carved into your brain to accommodate the tasks you've formed into habits. These habits can range from beneficial ones, such as exercising daily, to ruinous ones, such as smoking. Can you guess what habit of yours, however, about which I am most concerned?

I'll give you three guesses. And the first two don't count.

Of course, I am most concerned about the pathways you've created for your seriousness. You can easily identify them. Any time you feel stressed and unhappy you're following an ingrained path of seriousness that you created in your brain through years of repetition.

Don't feel bad; you're not alone. You're brain's pathways to seriousness were forged, just like mine, by well-intentioned parents, teachers, and other authority figures. These authority figures were only passing along what they had been taught - that becoming an adult means learning to get serious.

Your authority figures were only half-correct; becoming an adult means learning to take your responsibilities seriously. But not yourself! Taking yourself seriously leads to high levels of stress. And stress is not only responsible for 80% of your doctor's visits, but it is also the foundation for almost every physical ailment or condition that bothers you.

You already know that seriousness caused stress and that stress is killing you. So how can you change that? How can you escape the permanent quest for happiness that you never quite achieve? How can you return to the life of resiliency, vitality, health, and energy that you knew so well as a child?

Dr. Merzenich offers a solution for us that I endorse wholeheartedly: we must continue learning. As children, we are constantly involved in behavior-based learning, but somewhere as an adult we begin to trade being active for learning. This universal tendency to stop active learning is what creates the myth that our brains are hardwired as a child and then difficult to change later.

It's not difficult to change our behaviors and habits as we're older, we just don't do it! Dr. Merzenich recommends studying a new foreign language or learning to play a new musical instrument each year, just to continue building the neural pathways as in our childhood. I don't disagree, but first I want you to immerse yourself in The Fun Factor and build new pathways of fun, happiness, health, and vitality to replace your pathways of seriousness.

Like musicians, you'll soon have new enlarged and distorted areas of your brain. Except the areas will be those associated with happiness, joy, and freedom - even under your toughest circumstances!

Next week I will tell you about some amazing research that changed the way people with life-threatening illnesses are treated. And I'll also tell you why reading this blog each and every week is so important for your health and happiness.


Cliff Kuhn, M.D.
The Laugh Doctor

The Natural Medicine of Humor
"Discover a unique, FREE, and incredibly powerful prescription created out of desperation by a (formerly) stressed-out Kentucky psychiatrist"

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Sunday, April 10, 2005

Even Zombies Can Learn to Have Fun

I just spent a week with 20,000 zombies. Not literally, of course. But my family and I watched people shuffle around like dulled, mindless drones all week. I was shocked to encounter them and you'll be shocked too, when I reveal where we were last week...

My Dad, Dr. Kuhn, and I acknowledge that many things in life are not inherently fun. Paying your utilities bill, doing your laundry, burying your beloved pet dog, packing for a move, or changing your car's oil are all examples of tasks which are not only "un-fun," but which you might even dread. Nobody gets out of bed thinking, "I hope I discover a leaky pipe today!" Yet, because we are adults, we must deal with these "un-fun" responsibilities.

You have your own personal list of "un-fun" bugaboos. These "un-fun" responsibilities constitute, like it or not, a great portion of your adult life. Your personal list is precisely the reason The Fun Factor is your primary tool for your health and success, because The Fun Factor reminds you to turn those lemons into lemonade.

What is adulthood for most, other than a never-ending chain of serious, stressful responsibilities that we randomly relieve and reward with brief intervals of sanctioned recreation? Unfortunately, our efforts at recreation do not work - as I'll reveal in a moment!

Children, however, naturally search for fun in everything they do. And that continual search fills them with an otherworldly level of energy and optimism. That search also allows them to find fun in whatever they are doing; children don't wait for the attainment of some goal or objective to have fun.

Are you making the same deadly mistake that almost every adult makes? Are you accepting the "fact" that adulthood means less energy, poorer health, lowered vitality, and decreased resiliency? Why? Who told you that boundless energy, incredible optimism, superb health, and amazing resiliency are only for children? And, more importantly, why do you believe it?

At some point you did start to believe that lie! At some point you stopped looking for fun in all your activities and started waiting for your fun and happiness as the reward for completing them. A reward, unfortunately, that never arrives.

The essence of The Fun Factor is that your fun is always found right here and right now! I know you aren't interested in playing the same games you enjoyed as a child, but you must reacquaint yourself with your childlike willingness to have your fun where you find it because I am 100% certain that there will be utility bills, dirty laundry, a beloved pet to grief, a move to make, and oil to change tomorrow! And if you're waiting for your fun and happiness to arrive as your reward for finishing those tasks, then you only have more stress, more disease, less vitality, and diminished resilience ahead.

Why am I so certain about your fate? Allow me to reveal where I saw the 20,000 zombies last week -- Walt Disney World! Shockingly, amid a veritable fantasyland of pure, unadulterated fun, I will conservatively estimate that 92% of all the adults (non-employees, that is) I encountered at Disney World were unsmiling and unhappy.

"But," you're saying, "paying $5 for a hot dog, shepherding whiny children, and waiting in line 54 minutes for a 3 minute ride are not fun!" You're right, those things are not inherently "fun." But, like paying your bills and doing your laundry, those responsibilities comprise a great portion of your day at Disney World. And if you can't have fun at Disney World then what is it like when you tackle your "un-fun" responsibilities at home and the office?

I assume you're not at Disney World as you read this. Ask yourself, this moment, "Am I having fun right now?" If you answer "no," what are you going to do about it? Are you going to continue to put off your fun and continue your descent into stress, pressure, poor health, and lower energy?

Or will you recommit yourself to find your fun amid your "chores" and responsibilities? Will you reclaim your birthright of health, vigor, stamina, and resilience?

Today you escape your fate as one of the 20,000 zombies and you don't have to do it alone. Allow Dr. Kuhn, The Fun Factor, and me to help you remember and rediscover a world where life's little irritations are no longer pebbles in your shoes. Discover the fun, health, and happiness that awaits you this very moment!

Greg Kuhn
The Laugh Doctor Junior

The Natural Medicine of Humor
"Discover a unique, FREE, and incredibly powerful prescription created out of desperation by a (formerly) stressed-out Kentucky psychiatrist"

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